Sunday, August 31, 2014

Rio 2

The Barbarienne liked this sequel to, I dunno, some other movie we saw a while back. You could read that review and it would serve for this film, too.

Utterly forgettable. The Barb had seen this a month or two ago on Netflix ("Why pay for it when you can watch it for free at home!") and she kept saying things like "Oh, remember that guy from the original? And that one?"

No. Nope. Nuh-uh. Don't remember it much at all.

I vaguely remember there being music in the previous film. I think there was also music in this one.

Jesse Eisenberg! He's in this, and back. He's actually kinda doing a voice here; he doesn't sound like the same dick he plays in all his films. He's vested Blu with a little more quiet strength, as opposed to strained neurotic.

Miguel Ferrer and Andy Garcia add their voices to the menagerie of instantly forgettable characters. I think the rest of the crew is back, like...uh....Anne Hathaway as the female macaw and...Leslie Mann as the bird wrangler.

The plot? Um. Men are incompetent boobs that are only saved by their hyper-competent girlfriend/wives.

No, wait, Jermaine Clement is back as the evil...I have literally forgotten. Was he a bird? Or an evil human? I think he was a bird. He must've been because he was doing bird Shakespeare. He's still good but he's sharing screen villain time with a human antagonist who wants to destroy the Amazon Rain Forest.

For the past 30 years, I've been hearing about how we're destroying the Amazon rain forest. Over 2 million acres are still standing.

I remember when men used to be able to do things.

I digress. I digressed a lot in the movie. Even the animation didn't hold my attention. There are some bright spots there but the movie is just so relentlessly politically correct, in never comes within 2 million square miles of anything remotely interesting.

Bruno Mars has a kind of cute role as a feathered Lothario, though he's just as incompetent as the rest of the men, when you get down to it. The original score almost grabbed me a couple of times, but it's almost like this movie is basically an excuse to sell soundtracks on iTunes, and there really wasn't time for traditional scoring that might add some depth.

Rita Moreno has a little role as "Aunt Mimi".

Yeah, I'm reaching for things to say about it. I can't really remember it. The eight-year-olds I know liked it, but not a whole bunch.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Grab an umbrella. Unleash hell. Your mileage may vary. Results not typical. If swelling continues past four hours, consult a physician.

Contributors