Saturday, April 12, 2008

Pee-Wee Sports

The only legitimate purpose served by pee-wee sports is to allow parents to take pictures. So GET OUT OF MY WAY, FATASS!!

Sorry. I've never thought so many evil thoughts in the general direction of fat people as I did today. And some of them weren't even that fat.

But, look. I don't begrudge it when you block my view because your miniature troglodyte manages to knock the tee over in the right general direction. Could you pull back a bit when my perfect, sweet angel knocks one out of the park?

That'd be super.

I'm only partly kidding here, especially re the purpose of pee-wee sports. I was spectator at a number of "special" little league (I think they were even Little League(TM)) games and it reminded me how distasteful it is when grownups get involved--well, in pretty much anything.

Brain-injured children come in such hugely disparate levels of ability, it is pointless to try to get a group together for a particular athletic event, at least on a small scale. The Special Olympics probably has a good scheme, but in this local team, you had Down's Syndrome kids alongside others who were barely able to hold a bat. Also, you had ages ranging from 7 or 8 to 20.

I'm trying to think of a word to describe what I saw and the best I can come up with is "degenerate". Parents and coaches would actually try to win these games. There were a couple of 20-year-old Down kids who were minimally brain injured, and huge, and could literally hit the balls out of the park. These kids were used as pinch hitters.

Try to absorb that for a moment.

I actually saw less of it today, but I did see the coach put her own daughter on first base inning after inning, when all the kids were supposed to rotate. Yes, her daughter is very good, relative to the other kids (and she's a head taller). But that's not supposed to be the point.

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